Meeting My Body Today

showering in
the afternoon
is a luxury
afforded me
by the love of my life

i can wait
until the shards of sun
shine through
the bathroom window
before I disrobe

I can step into
sprays of sunlit water
where my mind is freed
and inspiration
douses me

this ritual
is a dip in
the wellspring
from which I write,
from which I work

on this afternoon
as I stepped out
onto the bathmat
I caught a glimpse
of my image
in the mirror

standing there
wearing rivulets
of light and water
I did not reach
to shield my body
with the white towel
I looked instead
and saw my body
in all it’s beauty

this is the first time
in recent years
that my body
has received an admiration
from me

at fifty-six
my body has not shed pounds
for a smaller size dress
nor is it more taut or fit
from exercise or diet
or a surgeons skill,
it has simply
become more lovely
this afternoon
through the
unexpected shedding
of an earlier version of vanity

As I turned my body
this way and that
in the mirror
all it’s lines and
new shapes
flirted with the sun

an older voice in me
laughed a silent laugh
that was musical to my ears
and joyfully, I stepped
from that moment
onto the dance floor
of my new life
wearing a transparent gown
and going playfully
barefooted

knowing this body
will grow older too,
I have bequeathed
my vanity,
gladly willing it
to Spring.

© Sanna Stein 2004